To Create 2017, Learn from 2016

dreamstime_xs_63165764Many people make New Year’s resolutions.  Many of those who make resolutions do not achieve them.

I think one reason is that many of us do not learn from the old year.  What did we do?  Why did we do it?  Did our decisions and actions achieve the results we wanted?  If not, what could we have done differently?  What worked, what didn’t?  What have we learned?

If you truly want to achieve your goals for 2017, I suggest you first think very strongly and clearly about 2016.  Use that knowledge to develop goals and plans for 2017.

May you learn from the old to create the new!

Last Minute Holiday Gifts

If you still need to get a gift for a friend, co-worker, associate, daughter, granddaughter, niece, or other woman in your life, please consider my books.  I write to encourage women to think about what they do, why they do it, and do they want to change.  Who do you know could benefit from that?  (Maybe even you?)

Click here to select your preferred product, vendor, and format and follow the link to order.

Thank you and may you have everything you desire this holiday season!

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If You Made the Rules, You Can Change the Rules

dreamstime_xs_37880536I recently realized that there are many things that I do that I don’t care to do anymore.  These are mostly little things like getting Christmas gifts for my brothers, sisters-in-law, nieces, and nephews and getting birthday gifts and cards and holiday cards for my nieces and nephews throughout the year.

When the family was smaller, this was fun.  I enjoyed it.  Over the years, though, as my extended family has continued to grow, and as my husband’s sons have married and had children, it has become less fun and a little overwhelming.

At first I felt guilty about not wanting to do these things anymore.  Then I realized that I was the one that told myself that this is what I needed to do to be a good sister or aunt.  There are no laws stating that I must do this.  These are things that most people do not do anyway.  No one has ever even told me that they expect me to do these things.

I made the rules on what I “needed” to do.  Which means that I can change the rules.  And I have.  And everyone has been very supportive.

I am using this concept for other aspects of the holidays as well.  Who made the rule that I must send out holiday letters?  I did.  I’m not doing it this year, and I may not send out cards next year.  With social media, I’m not sure it’s necessary to send cards to stay in touch.

Who made the rule that the house must be decorated so completely?  I did.  We had already decided to limit the decorating because we have a 6-month old kitten that believes everything, breakable or not, is his toy.  If I want to decorate more next year, fine.  If not, that’s fine, too.  No one else really cares.  (My husband cares about having a tree, but the rest is fluff.)

Who made the rule that I must cook big holiday dinners for both sides of the family?  I did.  This year we are doing appetizers for my husband’s side and everyone is bringing something.  They really seem to be looking forward to it.  I’m not sure what we’ll do for my side, but I already know it will be more convenience and less scratch.

I write and speak on encouraging women to think about what they do, why they do it, and do they want to change.  This is another way to think about the same concept.  Who made the rules that you must do something?  If you did, you can change them if you want.

This is something that you can use for little things, as discussed here, or for big things.  Who made your rules on what success means?  If you did (and you did) then you can change them if they are not right for you.