I was talking with a friend recently. Both she and her husband have careers that require quite a bit of their time. They also have two small children that require a great deal of time. She mentioned that she wished her husband would do more around the house and with childcare. I asked her whether she thought he could see the work that needed to be done. She didn’t think he could.
I don’t think that is unusual. Unless you are the one doing the work on a regular basis, I think it can be difficult to see that it needs to be done. If someone else is being proactive and doing the work before it even needs to be done, it can be even more difficult.
There are many things in our house that I do that my husband doesn’t notice. But then there are many things that he does that I don’t notice. I’d notice if the furnace didn’t work, for example, but I don’t notice when he changes the filters to keep the furnace working properly.
A simple solution to this is communication. Before assuming the person won’t help, or doesn’t want to help, ask for help. This can apply to your professional life as well. If you need help from your supervisor, ask. If you don’t think she is aware of all you do, tell her.
Also take the time to find out what the other people in your life are contributing. It might be more than you think.
