The 3 R’s of Assertiveness

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This is a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!)  The 3 R’s are relationships, rights, and respect.

We all have professional and personal relationships.  Within each of these relationship we and the other party have certain rights.  When we do not respect ourselves and our rights, we are passive.  When we do not respect others and their rights, we are aggressive.  When we respect both ourselves and others, we are assertive.

I published this presentation previous in a series of five segments.  If you did not have an opportunity to watch the segments, I hope you will learn something in this one that will help you achieve the success you want.

Equal Partnerships

dreamstime_xs_32614115Equal Partnerships (Video)

Throughout these blogs we have talked about you.  Your rights.  Your responsibilities.  Your choices.  Your life.

It is necessary to remember, though, that everything we have discussed applies to everyone.  This means, that if you are in a committed relationship, your partner is just as important as you are.  The life he wants is just as important as the life you want.  Not more important, but as important.

I think a committed relationship should be an equal partnership.  Each person should work equally hard, take on equal responsibility, and give as much support as he or she expects to receive.  It is necessary for both people to work together to determine how their life together will meet their individual desires and goals.  It may take some negotiating.

The opposite of an equal partnership is a double standard.  That is where it is all about one person and about what that one person wants.  If you are in a double standard relationship, and it is all about him, can you change things?  If not, is it worth staying in that relationship?  If you are in a double standard relationship, and it is all about you, remember that he has the same rights as you do and can leave you.  You might want to make changes before that happens.

An equal partnership is a beautiful relationship.  I recommend that you always remember that your partner, and what he wants, is as important as you, and what you want.

Stealing Stuff

hStealing Stuff (Video)

This blog provides additional information to the attached video clip.  The clip is from an assertiveness presentation I did for The Business Building Academy.

In my presentation on assertiveness, Don’t Act Like Prey!, I discuss the three R’s of assertiveness:  relationship, rights, and respect.  In this presentation I used the customer/supplier relationship as an example and we discussed the rights of each party.  In this clip, we are discussing the rights of the supplier.  One right of the supplier is that the customer will not steal her stuff.

I never would have thought of that until this story happened to me.

Stress Less for Less Stress

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We all have stress in our lives.  We have stress in our professional lives and we have stress in our personal lives.  People and situations cause us stress.

And yet, most of our stress comes from us.  We create stress.  We create more stress than we need to when we worry about things, when we overreact to things.  The more we stress, the more stress we have.

If you want less stress in your life, stress less!

Do No Harm, and…

Do No Harm, and… (Video)

“Do no harm” is a phrase that has been around for a very long time.  I think this is a good concept to live by, up to a point.

I read somewhere (I do not remember where) an addition to this phrase that I really like:  “Do no harm, and do not let anyone harm you.”

When we are aggressive, we harm others.  When we are passive, we let others harm us.  When we are assertive, we find the balance.  We do not harm others, and we do not let others harm us.

For more information and exercises to help you become more assertive, or assertive more consistently, see my book, Don’t Act Like Prey! available through www.SusanLFarrell.com or from Amazon.

Assertiveness (5), The Finish of the Story

The attached video is an excerpt from a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title of the presentation is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!.) 

Part 5 finishes the story started in the first segment.  It includes important points to remember when you are in a situation where you know the best thing is to be assertive.

This is the final segment of the condensed assertiveness presentation.  I hope you have learned at least one or two items that you want to implement to improve your success.

Assertiveness (4), Respect and Metaphors

The attached video is an excerpt from a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title of the presentation is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!.) 

Part 4, Respect, discusses the importance of respecting ourselves and our rights.  When we do not, we are passive.  It also discusses the importance of respecting others and their rights.  When we do not, we are aggressive.  By respecting ourselves and others, and acting accordingly, we are assertive.

It also discusses using wildlife metaphors for describing passive, aggressive, and assertive behavior.

Each week I will post the next section of the presentation.  Last week was on rights.  Next week will be the final, the finish of the story stared in section 1.

Assertiveness (3), Rights

The attached video is an excerpt from a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title of the presentation is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!.) 

Part 3, Rights, discusses how each party in any relationship has certain rights.  When we do not recognize and stand up for our rights, we are passive.  When we do not recognize that others have rights, we are aggressive.

Each week I will post the next section of the presentation.  Last week was on relationships.  Next week will be on respect.

Assertiveness (2), Relationships

The attached video is an excerpt from a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title of the presentation is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!.) 

Part 2, Relationships, discusses how we all have professional and personal relationships.  Positive relationships will help us achieve the success we desire in life.

Each week I will post the next section of the presentation.  Last week was the start of the story where I needed to be assertive in a work situation, but was uncertain how to proceed.  Next week will be on rights.

Assertiveness (1), The Start of the Story

The attached video is an excerpt from a very condensed presentation on assertiveness.  The title of the presentation is The 3 R’s of Assertiveness.  (An alternative title is Don’t Act Like Prey!.)

The 3 R’s are relationships, rights, and respect.  If we can remember these three, it becomes easier to be assertive in any situation rather than passive or aggressive.

Part 1, The Start of the Story, includes a work experience I had where I knew I needed to be assertive, but did not know immediately how to do that.

Each week I will post the next section of the presentation.  Next week will be on relationships.